DentalLand, the First Dental-Themed Amusement Park to Open Soon

Orlando, Fl– Dentists and their office teams are always looking for a good time and soon they will have an amusement park made specifically for them. This fall, DentalLand will open its gates to oral health professionals and DentalLand CEO Jane Kennedy couldn’t be more excited. “Whether you are a dentist or hygienist, assistant or office manager, general dentist or specialist, DentalLand has something for you!” said Mrs. Kennedy. “We have white-knuckle roller coasters for the periodontist who likes to live on the edge, relaxing parades and live music for the veteran assistant who’s still hanging on, and everything else in between.”

DentalLand will have a variety of themed areas in the park all named after different dental specialties, including EndoLand, Perioland, OrthoLand, DentalPublicHealthLand, and more. 

According to Jane Kennedy rides will include: 

  • Pirates of the Reimbursement: If you dare take this adventure, your timbers will be shivered as you watch dental insurances pillage and plunder from dentists everywhere. 
  • Dental School Roller Coaster: This up-and-down experience culminates in a drop over Student Loan Falls, which makes every rider question their decision to try this ride. 
  • Halitosis House: You will wake up in the middle of the night with cold sweats as you remember the smells you experienced in the house of death breath. 

And what about the much-anticipated ride ADA in Wonderland? “We apologize that this ride isn’t functioning like it should, but we are hoping it will be up and running soon,” said DentalLand’s CEO. “We expected this to be our cornerstone ride, but it isn’t representing DentalLand like it should.” 

Rides are not all that will draw visitors to DentalLand. Some of the other unique attractions will include: 

  • Perio Parade: Patrons will be treated to hypnotic music and a dazzling laser show as parade performers  sprinkle them with the same magic pixie dust that periodontists use daily to heal their patients’ ailments. 
  • Great Moments with Dr. Black: Encounter the father of modern dentistry as he takes center stage to expound on the history of restorative dentistry and give his vision for the future. 

CEO Kennedy is looking forward to DentalLand’s gates opening wide. “Human-sized mice are fine, but I think DentalLand will be the world’s new magic kingdom.” 

Contact your salesperson for ticket prices as they are unlisted in DentalLand’s brochure or email The Facebow at thefacebow@gmail.com. 

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